Peace is in the present moment.
“My inner peace comes from being in the present moment where I can truly live, love, and learn.” - Peggy Wu
I have two coaching clients who struggled to get out of their heads and focus on what’s in front of them. One keeps feeling she’s not good enough in her career and her peers are much cooler than she is. One gets stuck in the people-pleasing mode and constantly worries about how others perceive her. They are intelligent and self-aware individuals. The most significant commonality between them is the wish to be perfect….and it’s exhausting! I often spot perfectionist tendencies in my coaching sessions, and everyone has their own reasons why they need to be perfect. It’s a relatable subject that I’ll talk more about, but today, I want to spend our time on what we can do to get out of the headspace and find peace. And that is simply practicing being present.
We all know the importance of being present, but we might not have the skills to enforce it. If this resonates with you, below are a few options to bring yourself back to the now when you feel your mind is all over the place or have anxious thoughts. The key here is to find one that works for you.
Sit quietly or meditate. You don’t have to have a prolonged practice; sitting with your eyes closed for a few minutes every day to focus on your breath or, for some, get into a meditative state helps you clear your head and relax your mind. It may not be easy to do this initially, and it will take some time to establish the new habit of quieting down. But when you finally can, you’ll be able to shift your attention to the present moment much more quickly despite distractions.
Practice breathing techniques such as cleansing breaths and box breathing. Cleansing breaths are simply breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth. Do 5-10 rounds when you need a reset. Box breathing is when you inhale for 4 counts, hold the breath at the top for 4 counts, exhale for 4 counts, and hold the breath at the bottom for 4 counts. Do 3-5 rounds, all through your nose, when you feel anxious.
Body scan in standing, sitting, or lying down position. Notice the feet on the ground or heels touching the floor and wiggle your toes. Slowly bring your awareness upward to your ankles, calves, shins, front and back of the knees, hamstrings, quadriceps, front of the hips, side of the hips, buttock, lower back, mid-back, upper back, shoulders, arms, wrists, hands, fingertips, lower abdomen, stomach, chest, throat, face, and eventually arrive at the top of the head. If you are short on time, feeling the ground under your feet, moving your toes, relaxing your hips and shoulders, and taking deep breaths can be done quickly and have a positive effect.
Name your five senses. Observe what you hear, touch, see, smell, and taste in the moment, and name them either out loud or inwardly. If you have more time, you can do the 5-4-3-2-1 method instead, where you acknowledge 5 objects you see, 4 things you touch, 3 sounds you hear, 2 scents you smell, and 1 thing you taste.
Go for a walk or get some movements in. Go outside or stand up to move your body and bring awareness to the sensations. Check in with yourself - what am I experiencing right now?
Release your emotions through writing. Get everything out of your head through flow writing. Set a timer for 5-10 minutes and just write. There is no right or wrong, good or bad, or judgment. It’s you and the pen and paper. Let your feelings flow onto the pages - no need to hold back.
I hope the above techniques will serve you in some way. I’d love to hear about it if you decide to give it a try. If you have tried the above, let me know what works best for you.
